Fatty fat fat

In case you can't tell from that picture, those dolphins are terribly overweight. It's true. Apparently they have been snacking on increasingly-fatty mackerel, who have been slacking off and are not in fighting shape. (Mackerel are well known for their fighting ability you see). Undoubtedly the Mackerel have gotten lazy due to the increasing number of "dead zones" in the ocean, which means less competition for whatever it is that they eat. Ecology.

Anyway, dolphins:

Kinosaki Marine World in western Japan said Tuesday that all its 19 dolphins have been on a low fat diet since late August, when they started failing to hit jumping targets and keep upright while treading water.
"We were puzzled by their poor performance, then we noticed they looked rounder," said Haruo Imazu, the park spokesman.

First they were to give the dolphins liposuction, but then they realized thats stupid. So now they are on a new diet and increased exercise, which will hopefully get them back to being dol-THINS! Bahahahahaha. Gunshot.