Ow, My Balls!

The headline above is taken from the most popular show 500 years from now. At least in the mind of Mike Judge. Idiocracy is Judge's cult (read: little seen) satire set in a dystopian future where the population has become immensely stupid because morons have way more kids than the smart folks. Luke Wilson is cryogenically frozen for 500 years as part of an army experiment gone wrong, and when he wakes up he is the smartest man in the world.

The film is a bit uneven. There are funny parts and parts that ring true, sure (Welcome to Costco. I love you.) But there is also Dax Shepard as the most annoying character outside of a Dane Cook movie.

Those who have seen it know about how once the government learns that Wilson is the smartest man alive, they ask him to figure out why all their crops are dying. He thinks it may have something to do with the fact that they water their crops with Brawndo (The Thirst Mutilator) and not water. It's got what plants crave!

Well, in a sad, sad turn of events -- it's never pretty when life imitates art -- Brawndo is becoming a real drink. Christ. Nevermind that the commercial blatantly rips off Powerthirst and yet isn't as funny.

The movie was fucking satire people. It was mocking our super-consumer ways. When a satirical drink in a film about how far humanity has fallen due to outright stupidity becomes an actual product you can buy, well, I weep for humanity. I pray that this is an elaborate joke.

Moving on. This post started as a reason to put up a kind of old video. Then I got carried away with my Idiocracy talk. Ha ha, Beef Supreme.

So, anyway, there's this newfangled cup called the nutty buddy, which was inexplicably been featured in a story by the Associated Press. Truly we are entering a new age of ball protection.

I think I saw this video on Deadspin or somewhere like a year ago, but the goats unofficial motto at this point is "better late than never."
Also, it's worth taking a look at the web site.