Finally, the English soccer league preview no one knew they wanted: Teams as interpreted via internet videos. Selections made via a combination of drunken esoterics and personal frustration.
Blackpool
Aston Villa
Chelsea
Manchester United
Arsenal
West Bromwich Albion
Stoke City
Sunderland
Newcastle
Everton
OK that picture doesn't do the adrenaline that is still coursing through my veins and arteries justice, nearly an hour after Donovan put the U.S. through to the knockout stages with a goal in the last minutes (edit: now with a guy screaming in spanish). RIGHT AT THE DEATH! This is better (via):
Take that Algeria, you French-born bastards! Now we can look forward to a match Saturday at 2:30 p.m. against Germany or Serbia or Ghana or Australia depending on what happens this afternoon. The only thing I can guarantee at this point is that somebody's going to be tying one on that day.
One other thing that occurs to me on the comedown. There are few sporting events that can still get the butterflies stirring in the goat's old stomach like this. Professional sports just don't do it anymore, at least not since the 2008 Phils did their thing and let a generation of a city to feel what it was like for their high-paid heroes to win it all. You only have to look back at the posts from September and October of that year* to see I was into it, then. But these days it takes the World Cup, or college football involving my alma mater and 70 pass attempts in bowl games to get that head in hands/rocking in my seat heebie-jeebies going. Probably has something to do with a fan-player dichotomy that exists in pro sports and not in amateur. But who the fuck cares about that right now. America! Fuck Yeah!
*with classic phrases like "Hot 'Cooch' Carl's game-winning nubber"
I took a little break from posting on here. I was thinking, "hey maybe one of the other 'authors' will put something up." Not surprisingly, no one did. You lazy fucks.
So in the interest of not really having a point, here's a couple things I've been mulling -- besides the United States beating Mexico for the Gold Cup (soccer matters). Both of the following have been mentioned before (not necessarily by me, but the blagosphere is ad nauseum).
The Wire is so fucking good. I've been watching the old episodes on DVD to catch up before the fifth and final season.
As the season approaches I'll probably offers some more in depth stylings, character analysis, themes -- you know -- all that smart guy stuff. But for now, enjoy this video, especially if you've never seen it.
It's the entire first episode of season four. Hope you have an hour to kill.
I don't want to ruin it for you, but lets just say Snoop doesn't use that nail gun for what you think. Also, that opening scene is classic "Wire" in how it shows the interaction between the "straight" world and the "street" world. Home depot dude is totally befuddled.
Has anyone ever sold out more rapidly than the Black Eyed Peas?
One minute they were recording tracks like "Where is the love?"
The next minute they are changing the the lyrics of "Let's Get Retarded" to "Let's get it started" for a shitty NBA playoff promo. Yes, worse than David Blaine.
Fergie is fucking awful. My Humps? London Bridge? I will not post or link to either of those crimes against humanity.
And don't get me started on "Fergielicious."
What does that even mean? Can she only be described by a word combining her name and -licious? At least Beyonce can back up bootylicious claims with visual evidence.
From now on I will excuse all my actions by describing myself as thopetastic.
