So bad its good: Deep Blue Sea

I was going to write So bad its good: Jet Li's The One, but I can't remember enough about it. There is not one universe, but a MULTIVERSE.

So Deep Blue Sea it is. Renny Harlin's crowning achievement. As I always say, "Its as good as a movie about super-intelligent sharks can possibly be." I mean just look at the poster.

That shark is totally sneaking up on her! Also, the lead actresses name is Saffron. Like the herb.

In case you haven't seen it, which is inexcusable, its about a team of researchers led by saffron, Stellan Skarsgaard and SLJ in nerd mode. They work at an underwater research facility, where they are testing alzheimers medicine on sharks? Maybe? All I know is "The sharks got smarter." Also, LL Cool J is a wise-ass cook.

Anyway, Tom Jane brings his crack team of shark afficianados(or whatever, Jane knows sharks, in the biblical sense) down to the undersea facility, when a storm/helicopter crash floods the facility, setting the sharks on the hunt. On the hunt for humans. (sorry)


Key scenes
LL Cool J escapes from shark by climbing into his own oven. After the shark ate his pet parrot. The shark turns on the oven, cause it wants a hot meal of course. So LL uses the hatchet he happens have on his person to hack through to the upper oven, at which point he dives over the shark, which is still attacking the lower oven. Stupid super-intelligent sharks, when will you learn? He then delivers the classic one liner "You ate ma' bird." and throws his lighter back into the oven/shark region causing an explosion. I guess they were gas ovens.

Saffron strips down (wooo woooo!) because she must use her wetsuit for its non-conductive properties when she totally electrocutes another shark. Pretty sure this wouldn't work. Got my fingers crossed that they'll test it on Mythbusters, otherwise we may never know.

LL Cool J escapes death by stabbing a shark in the eye with his cross necklace.

And of course, the immortal scene where SLJ delivers a totally cliched inspirational speech, followed instantly by a shark eating him. Unfortunately I couldn't find a clip, but this 10 second highlight reel is chock full o' shark-bitey goodness.