5. Half Baked
Oh David Chapelle. Your rapstar Sir Smoke A-Lot blows the future Rick James out the water. My favorite scene is when Scar Face (“he’s kinda high strung for a stoner”) quits his job at the burger joint.
4. Caddyshack
This movie makes sense because playing golf sober does not.
3. Yellow Submarine
Bonus points for never referencing the stonering directly, keeping instead to a system of allegory that involves blue meanies and talking gloves. George Harrison is so much bigger than Jesus, especially when he shows up on the mountaintop all hippy long-haired. In contrast, John’s just weird.
2. The Big Lebowski
I’m okay with making this number two because, in my list of best movies of all time, it’s easily number one. “This case has a lot of ins and outs, what have yous, but thankfully I’ve been keeping to a pretty heavy regiment of drugs and alcohol, to keep my mind clear.” And as opposed to the infant Jesus, I prefer to worship this purpled one, as per his priest, Liam.
1. Dazed and Confused
This is its own universe of stonering, complete with socio-stratified levels of take and abuse. A fucking masterpiece that only gets better the more it’s watched. And the music rocks. And drugs make you throw bowling balls through shit. Goddamn. I wanna watch it right now.
nobody fucks with the jesus.
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